Old Dog. . .New Tricks

I’m almost 69 years old, and I did something today that I’ve never done before. I had never mowed the yard on the riding lawnmower. My mowing the yard has never been needed before, but I figured it’s time I learned.

Today is cloudy and it’s not too hot. I suggested that Mr. Fixit show me how to the operate the mower. He wasn’t too thrilled with the idea. But I was not to be deterred.

The first thing I learned was that I needed sturdier shoes that the sandals I had on. The one-pedal-does-everything is hard to depress completely. I found out it is makes it go, and it is the brake  and clutch. Some designer in his wisdom put it on the left side of the machine; I seem to be right-footed. After he told me how to start, stop, and control the blades, I was ready to ride."Born to Be Wild" suddenly popped into my mind.

He said to put it on “1.” That is the slowest it will go. You would think after 48 years of marriage he would know that I like the feel of the wind in my face. I drove it about ten feet and told him I wanted to go faster. He said I could move it to “2.” Another ten feet--not fast enough. I wanted to try “3.” Okay, that was more like it. (But when I’m allowed to mow without supervision, I may get it up to the “5” level. I could probably finish mowing in 20 minutes.)

I put the blades down and started to mow. The first thing he told me that I was going in the wrong direction. The clippings-spitter- outer thing should always spit back into the yard so that is no danger of hitting passing cars or the neighbor’s car in his driveway. I began mowing in a clockwise direction.

I discover that our yard has lots of holes and dips that scared me a little. I didn’t want to flip the mower on my first try.

I also need a picker-upper for the bigger twigs and stuff that shouldn’t mowed over. I’ve seen Mr. Fixit just bend over and pick stuff up while seated, but I’m too short. I would probably tumble butt over tea kettle and do myself grievous bodily harm.

When I mowed for a bit, I wanted to try reverse. That worked out quite well after receiving detailed instructions.

The whole time I was mowing I could see him inwardly cringing when I ran over a twig or missed a spot. He also told me not to mow under the trees where the roots are protruding. I was glad to oblige on that one. When I headed to the back of the house to put the mower away, I think I heard his sigh of relief over the roar of the engine.

But Hot Damn! I mowed the yard! The next project is the small leak under the sink in the upstairs bathroom.